Marital Counselling

Couples Counselling Feeling alone despite being married? Wondering if you are still in love or just going through the motions? It is all too common in these busy times. My approach is based on Emotion Focused Therapy developed by Dr. Sue Johnson (author of Hold me Tight: seven conversations for a lifetime of love) of the Ottawa based EFT Centre. This model is based on attachment theory and it works! You will not get along better or feel in love based on arguing about who is the most right! EFT helps couples reconnect at an emotional level by helping people communicate at a much deeper level and learn to be vulnerable and mutually supportive- sometimes for the first time. Although couples often express how awkward & uncomfortable it can feel, especially in front of a perfect stranger (me), they also gladly admit how it can help to actually look their husband or wife in the eye and communicate “from the heart”. Emotional intimacy often brings on physical intimacy. After several years of experience, I have learned to start my work by meeting with each person for an individual assessment prior to any joint sessions. This allows for a more honest and thorough assessment as people feel free to state their true feelings and thoughts without having to measure and weigh every word. This also allows me to assess for circumstances which may be contraindications for couple therapy such as; 1- undisclosed extra-marital affairs which a person does not want to admit to their spouse, 2- domestic violence, 3- untreated substance or compulsive behavior such as gambling or sexual addiction or 4- a person not feeling ready to engage in couple therapy and needing more time to decide on their own without feeling obliged by their spouse. As an EFT trained counsellor, my goal will be to teach you news ways of relating and homework tasks will be involved. As in most instances, people will get out what they put in to marital counselling sessions.